Speakeasy DC is the only open mic in the city that I haven't been barred from (yet). It's not just about the stories though. I like the subversive-preppy strata that shows up to listen. Last night there were about 200 people there and when a performer asked the lawyers present to raise their hands, there was not a single lawyer in the house. Amazing.
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Marion Bartoli is a steroid queen that got a lucky draw and happened to meet up with the Belgian cyborg when she had three sprained giblets. You realize, of course, that she is going nowhere fast except the the scrap heap of professional tennis. I have more talent laden in my left buttock than that steroid monkey has in her whole body. Just because she speaks French somewhat fluently does NOT mean that she's a captivating human being. Get past the chick, move on to something else like "curling champions and the unshaven men who love them" or something similar.
I agree, Marion has me swooning as well. I love her unique brand of ballerina tennis. She makes the other women seem as though they are playing on stilts, blindfolded, and with a bad case of rickets. You, my friend, have good taste in tennis. What do you think of Annika Sorenstam?
Dearest Amir,
You must have a very talented left buttock. I have only been toying with the idea of actually caring about any professional athlete's career. My ex-boyfriend was a super tennis fanatic and basically brainwashed me into stalking Bartoli. I am too self-absorbed with my own struggles to be a fan of any consequence.
But yes, she had a very lucky draw. When I have seen here play she took SO many breaks. 'Marion Bartoli has called her trainer.' 'Marion Bartoli has called her coach.' 'Marion Bartoli has requested a medical break.' 'Marion Bartoli has called her psychic.'
I will look into curling champions, although I think I'm more into men's water polo...
Dearest Christopher,
I am glad you are overwhelmed by Super Marion's bizarre charisma. I'm a sucker for underdogs and iconoclasts. I love her bounce and her serve. I think that she's a smart player although she might (gulp) stand to have a few less frappacinos and improve her fitness a wee bit.... xoxoxoxo
I'm outside of Boston, do you frequent any of the live mikes around this area? I suppose I could hop into my earth killer to catch one of your impromptu shows, but quite frankly I'm finding the strain of life much more than I can bear lately and am hoping that a trip via the intense public transit can transport my flesh to a place ordained to have you on a stage in my area. DC isn't so bad, it's the people that get to me, if you can translate my Greek. What do you talk about, by the way? Observations, a la Jerry Seinfeld? Devastating commentary at wrong end of this one way street called life? Or do you sit in your cramped hovel and dream dreams, wondering in your more lucid moments where exactly it all went wrong? I do that sometimes. Often I'll just sit. Sit and yearn. For what I don't know. But I do know this: I couldn't possibly get up on a stage and pour forth speech illustrating my journey. Do tell.
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